Past Words Punk Bike Enduro My Summer as a Professional Bike Racer 24 Hours of Mall Rats		24 Hours of Mall Rats by David Blaine While the Single Speed World Championships were bringing the one speed community together in Bristol, England, halfway around the world in Spokane, Washington I was using my unicogger to blow apart the solo field at the Round The Clock 24 Hour Race. Many people questioned my decision to ride solo on a single, saying that adding insanity on top of stupidity would lead to unforgettable punishment. They didn't know about my secret training program. Having already done a solo 24 before, I knew that this event is not about the mega-mileage rides, the high-tech/low fat diet, or the latest titanium, air-sprung, lefty lockout platypus catheter. The bottom line is this: At some point (and frequently after that) you say to yourself STOP! You either give in to this sensible plea or you ignore it like e-mail spam. My secret training program hones my ability to ignore my better senses. For the last few months before the event, on the days when I would normally be trying to ride a hole in my shorts on a mind numbing road ride, I went to the Mall. On a bench between the Orange Julius and Sunglass Hut I would sit. I would stay there listening to the muzak, smelling the aroma of Cinnabon mixing with the stank of Regis Salon's Perm Special and resisting the urge to run away. Week after week I would build up my resistance until I was getting friendly, knowing nods from the gray-haired mall walking cult. I knew I was ready, but I watched Mall Rats and Day of the Living Dead just for good measure. On race day I stuck to my Motto: Rock on till the break of dawn! By daybreak the contenders and the pretenders had sorted themselves out. With two riders ahead of me, two riders on the same lap and 11 others trailing behind, it was apparent that 3rd place was going to be settled at the last minute. Before heading out on my 18th 11.5 mile lap, I switched from my standard Maltodextrin and Gummy Bear fuel to the hard stuff: Locally roasted Thomas Hammer Coffee and Kid Tested Oreos dropped my 1 hour 12 minute previous go around to a zippy 56 minutes. The buzz was short lived and subsequent laps of 1:05, 1:11 and 1:02 left me one lap out of 3rd. Fourth place has a lousy ring to it but doing 246 miles and beating a slew of great riders on their fancy geared bikes with 26 gears tiedbehind my back makes up for it. I received much needed support from the Dragon Tongue Racing Single Speed Team. They were the only SS team and missed first place by a matter of minutes. Gavin Spomer of SingleSpeedsAnonymous.com seems to be recovering from his addiction because he left his beautiful new custom-built Pattersoncraft 1x1 (copyright infringement? -ed) at home and was racing on a...gasp...geared team. His support was still appreciated. The promoter has committed to a singlespeed solo division next year if there is a minimum of three riders. There are two so far. Time to hit the mall. -David Blaine davidblaine@mac.com back to top